Monday, June 4 is my birthday and this time of year always makes me somewhat melancholy.  It’s not the idea of turning another year older.  I firmly believe that your age is just a number and means little. I certainly don’t feel like 42 (41 for the next few days) and I know I don’t act over 40.  You are only as old as you feel, right?

I feel pretty youthful!  I hope to stay as youthful as I can the older I get. In any case, I definitely want to remember the cool things about my birthday…or maybe I just think they are cool.

One cool thing about my birthday is that it is 6 months away from Christmas.  I like that a lot.  Another cool thing about my birthday is that everything about it is even.  I was born in the 6th month, on the 4th day, at 2:02 pm in the year 1970.  See…even.  I like things even.  My birthday always started summer vacation and that was another cool thing.  We could have parties outside when I was younger because it was warm (these days HOT) and the weather was always pretty.

One birthday will forever be burned into my brain.  I got the best present I will ever get, my father.  In June, 2000, my dad had been doing some heavy lifting work around the house.  He had been having severe shoulder and back pain for a day and a half when I noticed how bad it actually was.  My dad has a very strong pain tolerance and I had never seen him react to pain.  This Friday, he was sitting on the couch holding his shoulder and rocking back and forth in pain.  It was then that I told him I was taking him to the E.R.  He, of course, declined saying it was a pulled muscle.  My logic was that if that is what it was, they could give him some pain medication and if it wasn’t then he would be in good hands.  I told him I was not leaving until I drove him to the E.R.  I remember when he walked outside to get in the car, he slammed the door.  He did not want to go.  When we got him checked in, his blood pressure was over 200 and he was having angina pain.  He was admitted immediately.  They wanted to monitor him over the weekend and then do a heart cath on Monday.

He didn’t make it until Monday.  In the middle of the night, the pain started again and the cath lab was opened on an emergency basis to find out what was happening.  He was about to have a heart attack.  We got him there in time to stop any damage from happening.  He ended up with two stints.  All of this to say, that was my birthday weekend and he was my gift…..him being alright.

When I was growing up, my friend Kay always made a big deal out of my birthdays.  She would start in May talking it up.  My junior year in high school, she and my group of gal friends did something each period at school.  First period was a chip and dales card with condoms taped on the inside WITH the instructions.  Second period was a Play-Girl magazine.  Third was balloons….and on and on.  I got a James Bond book (I was really into the movies then) and the finale was an out of print vinyl recording of Duran Duran’s original album.  I had wanted that SO bad and she delivered. 

My freshman year, she had gym the period before I did so she put up a hand made poster in the dug out (we were doing softball at the time) so I would see it when I had gym.  She also decorated my locker that year.  And, after we had graduated in 1988, she threw me a surprise party at a friend’s house and her gift was my photography portfolio. I still have it to this day as well as the book, the album, and yes, the Play-Girl.

Some wonderful birthday memories…..they are bittersweet.  When Kay died June 28, 1988, I started dreading my birthdays.  They weren’t the same anymore.  That’s when I stopped wanting to be the center of attention any longer and birthday celebrations started making me feel uncomfortable.  That feeling has sort of hung on for all of these years. 

This year, I suffered another loss of a very close friend and those feelings of bittersweet are going to be freshly renewed.  However, I have new relationships that have developed over the last year for which I am truly grateful.  They will add to the sweet part of the bitter.

So this year, as I turn another year older and the feeling of melancholy sweeps over me, I am reminded of all of the special birthday memories that I have had and will continue to have, hopefully, for a long time.

As an animal lover, companion, rescuer, and sometimes activist, I had to share this link.  I couldn’t imagine not being with one of my furry babies so my heart totally goes out to Craig and his efforts to re-gain custody of Knuckles.  If you can, read the story and even contribute to his endeavor.

If the URL doesn’t work, try this link:

http://www.indiegogo.com/rescueknux?c=home

Thanks!

I can’t seem to get focused today.  I can’t make my mind work on any one topic for longer than a few minutes.  Maybe it is the fact that changes are happening within my family and within my regular routine. 

Donnie’s work schedule is always changing.  Marly is going to be changing schools.  Rory is going to be finishing second grade, changing teachers.  My close friendships have been changing.  Even my thought processes are changing as well as some of my interests.

I am one of those folks who does not like change.  I know it has to happen and I know it can be good.  However, I am not one to promote change and I tend to fight against it.  Right at this point in time, I sort of feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me and I have no solid footing.  This is not a good place for me.  It gets that anxiety churning.

I work hard to remain grounded and to keep the important things present in my thoughts.  Which brings me to the story of Aimee Copeland.  I’m sure every one has read her story recently.  She was on a kayaking trip in Georgia, went on a homemade zip-line and ended up cutting a gash into her calf.  This incident has resulted in her losing her leg, part of her abdomen, and possibly her life.  (I would like to take this opportunity to ask that everyone send up thoughts and prayers for Aimee and her family)

I read just this morning, that her father had to tell her the awful news that her hands and remaining foot were impeding her healing process and that they would have to be removed.  Changes….more and more….for this young lady.  Did she cry?  Get angry?  Ask “why me”?  No.  According to her father, her words were “Let’s do this!”

Her attitude and bravery should be an inspiration.  When you are faced with adversity, change, and even more change embrace it and look to how much better it could be for your life in the long run.

So for me, I will take the words of David Bowie to heart:

“Ch, ch, ch, changes…..turn and face the strange….”

captainminimimi:

I love it when people are affectionate with me. I like when they always invite me places, or text me, or call call me, I wouldn’t even mind if they blew up my fb wall with hearts and what not. I would rather have that person than someone who makes me text them first all the time and replies back like 10 fucking minutes later. 

bamsaidthelady:

The Stubble Kills | 8

Ok, there is obviously a theme this morning….and it is one of my favorites!  Love me some Nathan and “Firefly”!!

I don’t usually re-blog but this is just too cute!  I love that “Castle” constantly pays homage to “Firefly”. 

Recently, my extended family has been interested in the genealogy of our family. My brother even found where our great grandfather is buried as well as some other members of that side of our family.

Over the last week, my dad has been telling me some great stories from when he was growing up as well as other times during his life. Just the other night, he told me a story about him in 6th grade. Apparently, he was a bad boy during this grade and was quite familiar with standing in the corner. One time, when he had gotten in trouble, he said he looked up at the teacher and said, in his frog voice, “please don’t put me in the corner”. Since this was done in a frog voice, I can only imagine what the teacher thought or how she reacted. I was quite surprised that not only did my father have to stand in the corner in school but also that my father had a frog voice. I thoroughly enjoyed hearing that story from him.

Another story he has told me recently, was about a couple of his jobs right after graduating from Memphis State, which he lovingly calls “Tiger High”. In those days, he was to notify the draft board of his graduation. They told him, at that time, that they wouldn’t need him
right away so he was free to take a job teaching. A few months into the school year, they sent him his notice. The school decided to defer him so he could finish out the school year.

When the school year was finished, he went back to the draft board and they,once again said it would be another few months so he looked for another job. What ended up occurring, was that he landed a drafting job for a company down on Front St. in Memphis. He worked for a man named Mr. Phillipy. And as you can guess, once he had really settled into that job and was about to be set up in his own field office, the draft board came calling. This time he went. He recommended his brother, Bill, for his job with Mr. Phillipy.

My dad said that the first letter he received from home, after he had gone into the service, had a newspaper article in it detailing Mr. Phillipy’s death in a plane crash. He added that he still had that article.

I’ve heard stories about my dad’s youth since I can remember, but these stories he has shared recently were new and different. They have given me a different perspective of his experiences. But the fact that he got into trouble in school and then would keep a newspaper article about one of his first bosses really makes me feel more connected to him.

My dad has always been up on a pedestal in my eyes. I often say that he hung the moon in my world. He did and still does to this day. But hearing these stories make him even more down to Earth than he already is.

I’m proud of my family and where I come from but I’m even more proud of my dad and who he is….who he has taught me to be and what he teaches my children everyday.

I have always been drawn to the performing arts:  music, stage, actors, actresses, movies, musicals, etc.  One of my big passions is music. 

When I was younger, I used to play piano and excelled at it.  I could pick up a tune, read the music and play away.  My teacher, whom I loved dearly, stopped teaching and my mom tried to find me another so I could keep playing.  The one she found made me so unhappy that I quit piano altogether.  In middle school, I joined the orchestra and learned the violin.  I loved it and picked it up quickly as well.  I would’ve continued on in high school with it but unfortunately, the same teacher taught both the middle school and the high school.  She was not fun so I quit that as well.  My passion for music has never faded, though, and I have quite a library of it.

I am very set in the music that I listen to on a regular basis but I am very open to the new music being produced and released.  I have several talented friends who have released their own music and I celebrate their talent on a regular basis.

I posted in an earlier blog a song by Amy LaVere called “Stranger Me” off of her newest release by the same title.  I met Amy years ago on a fluke in Memphis, TN.  I am from Memphis but had never really done any of the touristy things to do there and, being a music person, I really wanted to go to Sun Records.  Amy happened to be our tour guide that day.  During the course of the tour, she mentioned that she was also a musician and after the tour, I went through the record store at Sun and found her first release, “This World is Not My Home”.  You can sample her music at http://amylavere.com/music. Amy and I have kept in touch over the years and she now has 4 albums under her belt along with several movie roles.  Her music is among the “set” I listen to on a daily basis. 

 I call those “itunes worthy”.  If I like a song well enough, it goes into my itunes library that I keep on shuffle and listen to all the time.  I am very picky about what songs are “itunes worthy”.  I may like the song and sing it often, I may not want to hear it from day to day.  I love all kinds of music but, and I know I’m going to offend some of you and I apologize up front for that, I can’t stand country.  It is a painful experience for me to listen to country music.  With that being said, I do celebrate some country artists and Amy, herself, can be thrown into that category. I wouldn’t put her there myself but some do.  I love Johnny Cash and that was only reinforced by the visit to Sun.  I love Patsy Cline.  That’s about as deep as my country roots go though.  I am also not a fan of opera.  Please don’t play opera around me.  While I can say that those performers are genuinely talented, I can’t stand to listen to them.

Another one of my good friends collaborated on an album recently.  Marty Young played his Irish whistle on his brother’s album, “Legacy”, and his daughter, Audrey, wrote the lyrics and sang on one of the tunes.  It is full of Irish and Celtic traditional music and is beautiful.  Audrey’s song is perhaps my favorite on the album.  Check the album out at http://legacyalbum.net.

My good friend, Norlynda Cook, is quite a good singer.  We used to sing all the time.  Singing is another one of my passions, although I only do it around people I feel comfortable with.  I don’t have the personality to “perform” in front of an audience.  I’m too self conscious.  But I enjoy watching others who thrive on that.  Norlynda was also an actress in college and very good at that as well.

All of this to say that I tend to gravitate towards talented individuals who can sing, play an instrument, act….perform in some way.  I had some friends in high school who were very talented in the performing arts (one of them has made quite a name for himself).  In fact, if I look back, lots of my friends were performers of some sort.  My role for them was always a supportive one since I couldn’t tackle my stage fright.

My nephew, Paul, has been blessed with this kind of gift.  I have been to many plays, improv shows, and a few choral concerts to support his endeavors.  Tonight, I will take on that role again as I watch him sing.  He has a wonderful voice and a great presence.  I love to hear him sing.  I’m sure that the others who are performing are talented as well, but you will have to forgive me if I am a little biased. My hope is that all of the performers tonight have a wonderful experience.

 I hope all of the performers in my life are going to continue following their talents and passions.  I know that I will continue my support of the arts….especially the performing arts.

Way back at the end of the 80’s and the very first of he 90’s, there was this little, cool club down in the Old City called Planet Earth.  It was an awesome place to go dancing or to see live music.  I hung out there quite a bit in those days.  As I was spending time there, I discovered this great little local band.  They were hip and fresh and very fun.  They were called The Judybats.  They had serious music, funny music, dance music, and music to just listen to and take in.  I started going to see them whenever they played.  I have quite a collection of old fliers they used to post on the phone poles along the strip at UT.

They played in all different venues around Knoxville, mostly in the Old City but I saw them the most at Planet Earth.

I remember going to Cat’s Records and Tapes and purchasing their self released cassette that had 5 songs on it.  I was afraid I would wear it out, I listened to it so much.   They started getting attention and signed with Sire records to go on and release a few cds, the first one being “Native Son”.  

There is quite the history for my family with that album.  My sister-in-law, Lisa was working at a company called Whittle with a man named Terry Casper.  Terry just happened to be the drummer for The Judybats.  In fact, Lisa made the liner notes on the cd as someone Terry thanked for support.  Also, when my niece was little, she would go through something close to night terrors where she would wake up screaming.  The only thing that would calm her down was when Jeff and Lisa took her into their living room and put on the song “Native Son”.  When she got a little older, she used to sing the opening to the song in her little voice.  To this day, she still loves The Judybats.

For me, a lot of the songs I had seen them perform live at Planet Earth were on that album.  I have wonderful memories of me and my friends dancing to their music.  One of my friends, Greg, was trying to keep up with the song “Convalescing in Spain”.  The song, however, speeds up and slows down many times.  Greg turned around  and said “I can’t dance to this beat!”